What did your mother say that made your jaw drop?

Well the other day she came into my shop asking for the usual discount and mentioned that she had tickets for the wimbledon Tennis final but couldn’t go.

“Mum why is my sister such a bitch!”

She said, “Oh no I can’t give you our tickets, if we can’t go, well we don’t go - it is just not done to give away final tickets.”

Why am I totally different than others? Why do I have a problem with my basic knowledge about society and reality? Why am I dumb and stupid?

Well I slept with the president of the Lawn tennis Association year ago, I think he may have remembered!!

So I said to my sister “ You mean to say that that you leave two empty seats rather than give them to your brother” I replied in astonishment. - “Well yes thats how it works in our circle!” responded my sister.

My mother said to me “ Why didn’t you speak to me about this before”

What is your opinion on the band Nickelback? Why do they receive criticism from some people?

“Oh come off it mum what would be the point?”

True - how I loved my mum!

What on earth has brought this on, said my mother?

Air India plane crash death toll rises to 270 - BBC

What do you mean son?

Well she is so snotty, O.K. she may have married a bit of money, I don’t know but she feels she is above everybody else.

Oh I said, can my wife have them she would give her right arm to see a Wimbledon tennis final?

What is the story behind bhai dooj?

About 30 years back, I was speaking with my mother.

Well son “ I think I might have got you some tickets”